Buddy system (guest post)

One of the reasons I started following the Gourmet Runner is that we seemed to be on the same path, even though we are in totally different locations.

We each moved to a new home at about the same time, and we both tackled the challenge of making new friends while working from home. (In my case, I felt incredibly lonely for the first few months of telecommuting. Now teaching fills that gap and I can't imagine that I ever missed being in an office 5 days a week...but it was a rough transition.)

So I asked Vanessa if she would write a guest post about some of her experiences in adjusting to a new home. Even if you live in the same town you were born in, I think you'll enjoy reading this as much as I did!


When people hear that I was born in South Africa, grew up in Hawaii and lived in Germany, England, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Hong Kong and now Georgia within my (relatively) short lifespan, they assume I must be a professional at making friends by now.

At least they don't interrupt!

And I am, if you consider statues and other inanimate objects “friends”. People made from stone aside, I do struggle with making new friends when moving to a new location. Living in a small town has made it more of a challenge, as so many residents know one other from as far back as primary school.

Plenty of room for company!

Thankfully, I’m not doomed to a life of solitude. Here are just a few of the ways I have found it easier to meet new people. Keep in mind that running is my hobby - if it’s not yours, mentally cross out running every time you see it and replace it with cycling, knitting, collecting stamps, skydiving - whatever.

1. Find a Running Group: Runners are everywhere. Seriously. Move to a small town with 65 residents and you’ll see at least one crazy old man chasing the cows at dawn for fun. Head to your local running store and inquire about running groups, or tack up a poster and advertise your own.

2. Start a Blog: I know, I know. I’m biased. But it worked for me. Not only have I made a ton of friends who I would consider myself quite close to through the internet, but I’ve had the opportunity to meet many of the in real life. Think of the blog as a friend filter. The only people who will stick around and read on a regular basis are those who have a lot in common with you already.

3. Pretend: No, I don’t mean pretend you have friends. I mean pretend you have confidence. You know those people who get on a bus or elevator and get off with 3 new friends? Pretend you’re like them. Force yourself to say hello to someone or strike up a conversation in line. Worst case scenario? I’ll be honest, it could be embarrassing for, oh - 3 minutes. Best case scenario? New friend.

4. Meetup.com: A friend recently told me about this site and my first reaction was to quickly close the screen so my husband wouldn’t see it. Although it sounds like a dating website, it’s actually a great way to meet people who are interested in different hobbies. In my area, there are a few groups who meet regularly for hiking and trying out new restaurant.

Blogger meetup.

At the end of the day, making friends is easier said than done. I get that. But these suggestions are a great way to get out there and meet new people. Once they meet you they’re bound to want to be your friend, right? Just win them over with that awesome personality of yours and you’re all set.

Have you ever moved to a new place? If so, how did you meet new friends? What advice would you give to someone new in your hometown?