Thursday, December 25

You might be a mother runner if (2014 holiday edition)

You might be a runner if...
(holiday edition)
  • All you want for Christmas is... a jogging stroller that isn't so heavy.
  • All you want for Christmas is... for your baby to sleep in so you can go for a run.
  • All you want for Christmas is... a babysitter willing to cover the hours from 6-9am on a Sunday, so you can run your favorite race.
  • You still decorate your Christmas tree with race medals... but now it's because your toddler has broken all of your other ornaments.
  • You avoid gaining weight over the holidays by run-streaking running after your sugar-cookie-fueled toddler.
  • On Festivus you've got "feats of strength" covered, but your list of grievances is mostly about sleep deprivation and toddler tantrums.
  • You can eat your weight in Christmas cookies after a long run OR after a long night of teething-related sleep deprivation.
  • Your yes or no RSVP to a holiday party depends on whether or not you have a race the following morning it works with your kid's nap schedule.
  • At holiday parties, your idea of "small talk" still involves bodily functions - sweating, cramping, and GI issues... but now you're referring to labor and diaper changes, too. (And you wonder why people shy away...)
  • You sing Christmas carols to your kid while you push the jogging stroller through your weekend workout. It has to increase your VO2 max, right?
  • Santa tried to recruit you for this year's sleigh team because he saw you running at night... wearing a blinking red light... because the only time you can find to run is after your kid is asleep.

What would you add to this list?

See the running jokes page for more "You might be a runner" jokes.

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